Mom's Brownie Recipe |
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- Remove teddy bear from oven and preheat oven to 375.
- Melt 1 cup margarine in saucepan.
- Remove teddy bear from oven and tell Billy "no, no."
- Add margarine to 2 cups sugar.
- Take shortening can away from Billy and clean cupboards.
- Measure 1/3 cup cocoa.
- Take shortening can away from Billy again and bathe cat.
- Apply antiseptic and bandages to scratches sustained while removing shortening from cat's tail.
- Assemble 4 eggs, 2 tsp. vanilla, and 1-1/2 cups sifted flour.
- Take smoldering teddy bear from oven and open all doors and windows for ventilation.
- Take telephone away from Billy and assure party on the line the call was a mistake. Call operator and attempt to have
direct dialed call removed from bill.
- Measure 1 tsp. salt, 1/2 cup nuts and beat all ingredients well.
- Let cat out of refrigerator.
- Pour mixture into well-greased 9x13-inch pan.
- Bake 25 minutes.
- Rescue cat and take razor away from Billy. Explain to kids that you have no idea if shaved cats will sunburn. Throw cat
outside while there's still time and he's still able to run away.
- Frosting
- Mix the following in saucepan:
1 cup sugar 1 oz unsweetened chocolate 1/4 cup margarine
- Take the darn teddy bear out of the @#$% broiler and throw it away -- far away.
- Answer the door and meekly explain to nice policeman that you didn't know Billy had slipped out of the house and was heading
for the street. Put Billy in playpen.
- Add 1/3 cup milk, dash of salt, and boil, stirring constantly for 2 minutes.
- Answer door and apologize to neighbor for Billy having stuck a garden hose in man's front door mail slot. Promise to pay
for ruined carpet.
- Tie Billy to clothesline.
- Remove burned brownies from oven.
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Elephant Stew
Serves: about 380 people.
Ingredients: Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method -------- ------------
-------------------------------- 1 large Elephant Salt and pepper to taste. 2 medium
Rabbits.(optional)
Preparation:
Cut up Elephant into bite size pieces.(Takes about 2 Months) Add brown gravy to cover. Cook
about four weeks at 465 degrees over a hot fire. Special Note:
For larger groups,add 2 Rabbits, but only if necessary as most people don't like to find hare in
their stew
To cook a turkey This
recipe is perfect for those people who just are not sure how to tell when poultry is cooked thoroughly but not dried out.
Give this a try.
BAKED STUFFED Turkey 6-7 lb. Turkey 1 cup melted butter 1 cup stuffing 1 cup uncooked
popcorn salt/pepper to taste Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush turkey well with melted butter, salt and pepper. Fill cavity
with stuffing and popcorn. Place in baking pan in the oven. Listen for popping sounds. When the turkey's ass blows out the
oven door and flies across the room, the turkey is done
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