A blond woman goes to the doctor, and complains that she has fallen and broken every bone in her body. The doctor doubts this, and asks her where it hurts. "Everywhere" she says. He asks her to be more specific. She points to her leg and says "it hurts here", she points to her hip and says "it hurts here", she points to her back and says "it hurts here", she points to her arm and says "it hurts here". The doctor says "you've broken your finger".

 

A girl came skipping home from school one day. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled. "We were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9,10!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" "Yes, it's because you're blonde," her mother replied.

The next day, the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids could only say it to D, but I said it to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" Yes, pumpkin, it's because you're blonde."

The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!" And she lifted her tank top to reveal a pair of 36Cs. "Very good," said her embarrassed mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" "No... it's because you're 25."

All 3 girls are stuck at the top of a building on fire and the fire brigade below have a net to catch them, so the fire brigade say to the Brunette, JUMP we'll catch you, so she does and the fire brigade move out the way and the Brunette dies.

Fire brigade then say to the red head, JUMP we'll catch you in the net this time, red head says no i saw what you did to the Brunette and the fire brigade say we didnt like her so just jump and we'll catch you, so the red head believed them and jumped. The fire brigade move out the way again and the red head dies.

Fire Brigade said to the Blonde, JUMP we'll catch you in the safety net, the blonde says no, no, no way! i saw what you did to the other two girls! And the fire brigade says sorry we didnt like them. The Blonde replied nope, im not jumping. "I'll only jump if you put the net on the floor and stand clear".

 

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all work

at the same office for a female boss who

always goes home early.
"Hey, girls," says the brunette one day, "let's

go home early tomorrow. She'll never know."
So the next day, they all leave right after the

boss does. The brunette gets some extra

gardening done, the redhead goes to a bar,

and the blonde goes home to find her

husband having sex with the female boss.
She quietly sneaks out of the house and

vows to return home at her normal time the

next day.
In the morning, the brunette says: "That was

fun, we should do it again sometime."
"No way," says the blonde. "I almost got

caught."